First Part
Fear. That's what I felt when I saw her. Fear of finding out that she's not real and I'm just imagining things. Fear that the world will come crashing down on me after a huge weight was just lifted off.
I grab the guy walking past me and turn him to face her. "Can you see her?" I had to find out if she was real or not but in doing so I may have scared the life out of someone else as this guy looked at her and then back at me and maybe he thought I was a mad man, which may of been true but when he replied, "Of course I can see her. Now can I go?" He looked at me like I may hurt him. I quickly let go of him only now realizing how hard I was holding onto his shoulder. "Yea, you can go." As he scuttled away I called back to him, "Sorry!" Through all this she just stood there in front of me smiling with out a care in the world, then she moved closer to me and spoke up with that angelic voice able to calm a grizzly bear, "Are you done trying to find out if I'm real or not." She then reached to grab my hand, I could feel the warmth of her touch on my skin. All I could focus on was her hand holding mine- "Ow." She pinched me. My slight yelp of surprise seemed to please her as her smile lit up and she gave a little giggle. I was still confused about why she pinched me it hadn't hurt instead it surprised me so I asked her, "Why did you just pinch me?" She then left go of my hand and instantly the heat went out of it, my hand was cold compared to the rest of my body so I put it into my pocket to give it some warmth. I don't think she noticed me hiding my hand as she replied, "Do you think I'm real now that you felt that?" I froze there, not knowing what to say I just looked at her. I tried to open my mouth to reply but nothing came out. I was standing there mouth gaping open while she smiled at me. I closed my mouth, smiled and replied. "Yea. I think you might be real. A part of me still thinks you're just a part of my imagination but if you are then this is the best thing I have ever imagined." After I stopped talking I wished I hadn't said as much. I never meant to tell her what I thought but I just seemed to be speaking out loud. I was waiting for some humiliating response for what seemed like forever when it was probably only a minute but it never came. She just stood there smiling at me with that heavenly smile. I only saw pieces of her last time and even then I was suffering hypothermia so I couldn't get a proper look at her. But now I can see her. I can see just how beautiful she was and I was wrong about one thing. She doesn't look like an angel because that is an understatement, she looked like a Goddess able to rival Aphrodite. Rays of sunlight flow through her hair subtly curling at her shoulders, stones of emerald flicker from her eyes, a full radiant smile painted with a soft pink rose and flawless tanned skin emanating warmth. "What are you staring at? Is there something on me? Is my dress ripped?" She spoke with wonder at why I would be looking at her. There was nothing on her, her green dress that matched her eyes had no marks on it, it was just her. I quickly shook my head snapping me out of my daze. I grabbed her hand and spoke, "I want to show you something."
Before she could reply I headed out of the building and across the street with her hanging on. I dared not look back in case she were to disappear from sight, it's probably stupid to think that seeing how I could feel her touch but I still couldn't take that risk. I push past people moving anyone out of my way until I get to the end of the street and right across the road is the building. I now stop and look behind and she's still there smiling at me, she hasn't disappeared. I point up to the top of the building and tell her, "That's where we are going, straight to the top." I keeping looking at her thinking she may not like it but she happily nods and keeps that smile on her face. When the traffic stops enough I dash across the road still holding onto her and rush to the building.
The old building stands in front now and she stands behind so I let her go and again my hand goes cold as if without her touch there is no warmth so I try to ignore it and ask her, "We got to get to the top and for that there are a lot of stairs. Are you ready?" She looks at me and that beautiful smile turns into a mischievous grin as she walks forward and says "Race you to the top!" Then she was gone, running into the building and up the stairs so I ran after trying to catch up. Each time I've been up these stairs I've been on my own so there was no need to rush and no noise but now I'm running with joy, chasing after her and instead of hearing the stairs creak as you walk on them there was this tranquil laughter echoing from above, "Catch up you slowpoke!" got shouted down from above. Going up these stairs has never felt more enjoyable as they are now but this being the third time on these stairs today this is also very exhausting. When I finally get to the top the pain in my leg starts pulsating turning my next step into a limp but when I turn my head I see her standing atop of the world and the pain seems to just disappear because she is all I notice.
The view from the top is usually amazing but now it's breathtaking, she stands there looking out across the city with the sun shining down on her from the heavens. She turns to me when she realises I've reached the top and asks so sweetly, "So this is what you wanted to show me?" I move toward her and bring her to the edge. I sit down and she follows. "This place is where I find peace, no one knows about this view except for you. It's a place to get away from everyone but not everything." When I spoke to her I looked around at everything I could see while explaining this place and when I turn back to her she's looking out at the view and she looks captivated by it. Then her expression changes into something filled with worry and sadness and she asks in a much darker tone than I've heard her speak, "Why did you bring me up here? I jumped off a bridge in the middle of winter into a freezing cold river full of rocks. What makes you think I wouldn't jump off of this roof?" Even though she asks me this with worry in her voice I can't help but smile at her, for some reason I'm not worried about anything except being here with her so I reply, "I jumped into that river to save you and I would jump off this building to save you but the way you looked out at this city just now tells me you won't jump. You can't jump. But if you did I would come after you because there is not an abyss I wouldn't dive into for you." My words seem to shock her as the expression she held changes again with her mouth unable to shape words and her piercing green eyes looked dazed. This must be what I looked like earlier. She turns away from me and looks back out at the view takes two deep breaths then reaches for my hand and there is that warmth from her again just emanating from her touch and she speaks "Thank you. I'm glad you jumped after me." After that she just sat there holding my hand looking and smiling out across the city seeing everything I see, taking in all the beauty that this place shows.
Time seemed to drift away as the sun passed across the sky showing the city in all it's glory but now as I look over at her she has the sun setting behind her and the image I held of her when my eyes were closed now showed in reality. The eyes so dazzled by what she sees brings out the emerald glow, her hair now shines with the last rays of sun at sunset, her skin holds the warmth I saw as I feel it in her touch still. Slowly a light scarlet colour started to flush her cheeks and her smile turned up into an innocent shy grin which finished with her biting her bottom lip and I knew for definite that I had been caught looking at her. I try to turn back to the city but I just keep getting drawn back to her because with her here there's nothing better to look at yet there's still the part of me which wants to remember every detail about her in case she disappears again. Suddenly she stands up and pulls me with her, stretching her arms out as far as they go as if she is trying to hold this scene while I'm trying to hold onto this moment. Then she spins round letting my hand go yet again the heat leaves with her touch and the cold surrounds my hand but I still don't mention it because I don't know if it's me or something with her touch so I keep quiet. She looks at me, leans against the handrail and shouts to the skies, "This place is amazing!" People on the ground probably heard her but she doesn't care and just carries on talking, "You can see everything from up here. This place may not look like much from the ground but up here..." she raises her hands and gives another twirl looking so innocent, "Up here everything is different, it's like a completely different city. I never knew it could be so beauti.....Ahhhhh!" The handrail behind her gave way and just like the first time I saw her, time seemed to stop. No sound, no movement, nothing.
The first time I saw her she jumped off that bridge and she smiled while doing it but now she's not smiling. Pure fear is showing on her face, she doesn't want to fall off the building like that bridge. This is not an abyss she wants to go to. She's stuck there with her arms flailed out trying to grab onto the bar but she couldn't reach anything. Her dress is ruffled and flared out by the wind. Her face has no shy grin, no sweet blush in her cheeks, no glow in her eyes only tears and terror show. She knows she's going to fall and she can't do anything about it. But I can.
My heart starts to slowly beat again, my arms start to slowly raise then time is back to normal and I'm jumping off the building after her just like I told her I would. My arm outstretched as far as it would go so I tried to push it further and there I see her looking up arms above her as far as they could go. My right hand grips onto her wrist and my left grabs part of the railing, the impact smacks us both into the building and it feels like my body is being tore apart but I keep my grip on both ends. I look down at her and she's there still with that look of terror on her and a slight graze on her cheek but she believed I would dive after her, "Grab onto my arm with both hands!" I shout down and instantly she does as instructed. Now that she has a good hold of my arm I start pulling her up. My grip on the railing starts slipping so I focus all my strength into my right arm and I pull her up as far as I can. I get her to waist level but it's still not enough so I push even harder. Doing this causes my right arm to start burning and stinging and my left arm to start slipping but I force her above me and she is able to grab onto the roof and drag herself up letting my arm drop. My right arm has gone dead from this, there's no strength in it so it's just a dead weight dangling at my side. My left arm only has a little bit of railing left to hold onto so I try to pull myself up but I can't get far enough before exhaustion starts to catch up to me. I try it one more time and my hand slips. I was able to save her but now I'm going to fall, I wanted to spend longer with her but maybe this is all the time I can have with her. If so it was a good time. In those few seconds where my hand slipped I had made peace but then she grabs onto my hand and is able to hold me there. There she is pulling me up so I try to latch onto the railing again and hold up my dead arm which she pulls and I use the remaining strength in my left until I get back up and drop onto the roof.
I just lay there exhausted physically and mentally. She lays right next to me probably feeling exactly the same but with a few tears strolling down her face, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to fall, even though I asked about it earlier. I'm so sorry! I didn't want anything bad to happen.!" Then she started to break into a full cry with tears and sobs. She apologized because she thinks I think this was set up. I don't know what came over me but I just started giggling which kept getting worse until I was in a hysterical laugh. The sobs seemed to stop as she looked over at me with that confused speechless look again, "What's wrong with you! Aren't you mad? This is the second time you almost died because of me! Why are you laughing?" I try to calm myself and have to wipe my eyes because tears have started from the laughter. I look at her calmly and speak, "I'm just glad that you're not someone who tries to kill yourself because you look like the kind of person who enjoys life. And that means there was a reason behind you jumping off the bridge. There was a reason behind that smile." She starts to sit up so I move with her and the tears seem to have run down her entire face so I move to wipe them off her left cheek. When I touch her face my hand feels the warmth of her cheek but the tears are cold, as cold as the river I jumped in for her. She seems to notice something and quickly brushes her eyes and cheeks then heads straight for the stairs. "Where are you going?" I shout but she doesn't stop instead she rushes down the stairs so I chase after her. When I get to the top of the stairs she is already a third of the way down so I rush down as fast as I can trying to catch up with her but she doesn't get any closer. When I hit the bottom I rush out of the building and spot her running around the corner so I chase after her. When I turn the corner she is still running and hasn't stopped so I keep running after her. I shout while running after her but she still doesn't stop not until she gets to the edge of the forest. "Where are you going?" I shout again and this time she shouts back a sad look shows on her face, "I'm late, I have to go home!" Then she turns and heads into the forest, the forest is off limits to everyone except the community hidden behind it. Everyone knows not to go there so if she is going there that means she is one of them which is a strange thing because they never come out of the forest. At least I know why I couldn't find her.
I quickly shout for her again because even though we spent the afternoon together ad I saved her again I don't even know her name. I need to find out what it is. "Wait! I need to know you're name!"....................Nothing. I get no reply, she's probably already gone but I wait. A few minutes later I get my reply. "If you really need to know Jace, it's Evelyn Cinder!" Then there was silence again, I now have her name and somehow she already knows mine. I know now that she's real and not part of my imagination but there's still so many questions I want to ask, so many things I want to know but for now just her name is good enough.
Evelyn Cinder the girl from behind the forest. The girl I'd dive into the abyss for.
